How to make him fall in love after a breakup: 10 tips to succeed!
Getting your ex-boyfriend to fall in love with you again may seem like an impossible task, but it isn’t. To do this, first of all, you need to think about what ended the courtship, and then find ways to demonstrate the best you have. Here are some tips to get your love back and rekindle a peaceful and lasting relationship.
1. Analyze the past relationship, any mistakes made, and strengths
First, try to look at everything with intellectual honesty, objectivity, and rationality. You must try to understand specifically the dynamics and reasons behind the end of the relationship with your ex.
Everyone has undoubtedly their faults but now focus on your possible mistakes and the behaviors that may be at the origin of the breakup. Look inside and question yourself. It is a mature and fundamental step to try to grow and not run into the same dynamics. Whether you resume your story, whether you continue your life with another person, it will undoubtedly be useful for you to avoid repeating mistakes or not very virtuous attitudes that are not good for the couple in general.
If you come back with him, even more so, you will have to try to eliminate them, so that you start on the right foot. But be careful, he too will have to do his part.
But also try to focus on the strengths of your bond: those could be the basis from which to start again, both with him and with a possible new person.
2. Arm yourself with time and patience
If you think you will get what you want, you are on the wrong track. Life never gives certainty and the important thing is the path you will take, not always and only the result you will reach.
In this field, moreover, we are dealing with the wishes and feelings of another person, so you cannot expect to get what you want at all costs. Cultivate patience, sow, and always do useful things first of all to yourself too. Remember that to reach your goal it is essential to work on yourself, a step that is still necessary for your life and your inner and emotional growth.
What does this mean concretely? Don’t put everything on standby for this purpose, continue to do your life, fill it with other commitments and your normal daily activities.
3. Focus on yourself and your things
It seems paradoxical but the center must be you: and this, paradoxically, will bring it closer to you and help you to regain it.
Show yourself focused on yourself, growing and happy even without him. Take back your spaces and return to life at 360 degrees.
Go out with friends, go to the gym or engage in sports you love, pick up old hobbies and cultivate new ones, spend time with those you love, go on trips, and whatever makes you feel good. This is the right time to get involved, start new experiences, adopt new attitudes and discover parts of yourself that have never been explored.
Also, learn to be comfortable alone. This is something you will also need as a couple to make a healthy, happy, and lasting relationship work at its best.
4. Don’t be on him
Avoid reminding him in a variety of ways that you are always there and waiting for his nod. Do not try to appear obvious and predictable: absence and mystery will only give him a little healthy curiosity.
This is the ideal way to make him miss you and possibly tickle the desire to see you, contact you, and resent you. Even if he forces himself and doesn’t want to take the first step out of pride, it may be that your silence prompts him to act.
5. Also avoid the opposite excess: disappear completely!
If it is essential not to “stalk it”, because it could get tiring and put an end to it altogether, on the other hand, you must not even completely disappear or, even worse, block it and eliminate all traces. Deleting him or blocking him from social networks can only communicate the opposite message, giving him excessive importance, which would inflate his ego, confirming his idea of always having you available.
If you can, avoid making strong gestures, go on with your life in a normal way and without falling into excessive counterproductive reactions. Seeing you calm, serene, and intent on continuing your normal routine can only trigger a sense of discomfort in him if he is still interested and willing not to let you go.
6. Social networks: instructions for use
As anticipated, this point is rather fundamental and dangerous at the same time, so it needs extreme attention.
Sometimes it’s just an unconscious use of these powerful means that makes things worse and communicates wrong messages or what we don’t want to pass.
We have already said that it would be good to avoid blocking or deleting it: if you really can’t, you could for example hide it from your Facebook homepage, so as not to see it too often and run into unnecessary suffering, jealousy, and paranoia. It’s a great move because he doesn’t know. You can do the same with all his friends and relatives. Sure, you have to refrain from wanting to spy on him all the time, but knowing that this move will help get him back to you, you’ll be more motivated and disciplined.
Then there are two attitudes to avoid:
- posting compassionate statuses that show your malaise and suffering – you would arouse pain and no doubt would not attract her interest, sadly being a bit ridiculous.
- pretending to be forcibly happy, posting posts and statuses that don’t match your true character and a natural way of using social media. If you’ve always been moderate and shy with Instagram and cousins, avoid posting too many photos, documenting that you go out every night, and showing yourself with lots of male faces to show them you’re going further. You could lose it altogether as well as communicating a discordant, and therefore ridiculous and unnatural image. If you have always been a social addict, then you should continue to keep your classic behavior. Your ex needs to understand that you get on with your life without too many upheavals and earthquakes.
7. A pinch of jealousy wouldn’t hurt …
Indeed, we don’t have to do some psychology, but this trick always works. Warning, this doesn’t mean you have to pretend you’re engaged or show yourself on social media with all the men you know. Simply let it get to your ears that you are leading a peaceful, busy life and show yourself truly happy, open to new acquaintances and at peace with yourself.
Even a few photos on Instagram posing with male friends can be a good idea to whet the jealousy of your ex who, you know, is always lurking.
8. Reopen contacts by focusing on common interests
If you happen to talk or if you feel the need to contact him again after a while, you can do it starting from aspects and topics that bind you, perhaps precisely from the common interests that you shared during your relationship. But how do you have to behave in this case, even if he were to contact you?
- be calm, calm, and not too excited to see him
- try not to show resentment or anger
- don’t make him understand that you would do anything to get back to him: keep yours, courteous, kind but not too affectionate
- let him know in a natural and not too forced way that your life is progressing and that you are fine
The next steps will determine whether or not it will be appropriate to expose yourself a little more, even by looking at his moves. At the moment, however, do not overdo it with the manifestations of affection and desire: let yourself be sought and desired.
9. Recreate engagement by focusing on the things he loved about you
If the contacts continue, try to emphasize aspects of you that he loved during your relationship, avoiding instead reactions that led you to misunderstandings or arguments.
And if you talk about the end of your relationship, be calm and rational, also taking on your responsibilities if necessary. Seeing you mature and detached will only intrigue him even more. Furthermore, by doing so, you will also allow him to express himself freely without fear of hurting you or destabilizing you and you will be able to better understand what his intentions are and if there are real possibilities of getting back together and regaining him.
10. Show yourself to be sincere, do not pretend
Although we have undoubtedly suggested some tricks, remember that you must always be yourself. Do not change for him, do not distort yourself, even then, the relationship, if it were to resume, would not go well anyway.
If you are not appreciated for who you are and you feel forced to change part of yourself to please him, then it means that he is not your person, and someone else better will come along. Arm yourself with patience, be confident, and think positive – you will attract the right person.